the feet, stars and 25

I have just been back from Bangkok, about two days ago. And ever since then, I missed Bangkok, A LOT. Massive of stuffs had been happened and experienced throughout the whole trip, and this time, things that we’d experienced were far more exciting and thrilled comparing to the past two trips.

The time is about to be six in the evening and I am having my mixed fresh fruit juice (mixture of passion fruits and some other fruits and some vege if I’m not mistaken) while composing this post. There is a lot to share about this trip, but the first thing that I ever wanted to share at this very moment is the book that I have just finished that I bought from the Kinokuniya, Siam Paragon, Bangkok. Well, this is not the book that I was searching for. Honestly, I was heading to Kinokuniya to search for a gay romance book (not entirely romance though) that somehow echoed Andre Aciman’s “Call me by your name” sort of the details. I was wrong about this. Of course, I have expected a little bit more of homosexuality-related books out there, especially in Bangkok as this city has been nominated/ ranked as the top for GLBT to visit and tour. I was kinda disappointed with the total amount of books they have over here, merely the same as we could get it in Malaysia. Oh well, I just keep searching and searching, and finally I got two books that didn’t shout out loud that I am gay and I am needy sort of the books with male nudity pictures, but with a more subtle title and content that makes you wanna to finished it as soon as possible.

I got this book by David Levithan entitled Wide Awake, published at year 2006. If I’d gotten this book a year back I will definitely find it boring and I may have no idea of what is happening between the characters as well the blood boiling incident been described. No, I was not pointing to the sexual or any kind of incidents but the real community-gathered-together-and-fight-for-the-right kind of issue which had been perfectly weaved by David Levithan between the loves between two boys to the political issues. Okay, firstly, let’s talk about the author. The story could have turned into real boring political and unfairness issue, or a monotone love story line that you most probably will “awh-ed” yourself for being sadly alone in the night without a single companion at your side. But the chemistry that the author had made was real magnificent, specifically in my case. The reason is truly simple, today is the first of May in year 2013, and on this coming Sunday, which is the fifth of May (Sunday), I believe we are going to have the greatest election for our country. Plus, despite the desperation and neediness that I have been craving a love injection since decades, the total chemistry effect I have received from the author blasting out myself and couldn’t help but to share the whole feeling throughout this post. Thus, I have to pay my salute and respect to David Levithan for creating such a wonderful book. Perhaps other reviewers may not like it, but I guess I got it at the right time with the right spirit while reading the whole book. Plus that I have been freed from assignments and coursework till next week, easing the whole reading journey.  

Back to the storyline of the book, illustrating how minority has grown into a majority through respects, understanding, harmonies with the name of humanity, with the love from God. Yeah, that is quite cliché and I can’t really believe that I actually will read and finished it. Oh well, dear God, this is one hell of the most interesting book that I have ever read and finished it in two days. Story started with the election been won by a gay Jewish and this news has been spread all over the states. However, of course, there were people who don’t really happy with the result, especially the Decents. Then of course, the governor of Kansas was unhappy with the result and decided to have a recount session and that started the whole rally and protest. Nothing much else could be share over here as that could be a spoiler, but there is actually nothing much else to tell too. The interesting thing that resonates to gay community or especially me through this book is the view of Duncan. I can’t deny that at most of the points, I pretty much stand on the Duncan’s view in judging a lot of stuff. Despite how annoying he was throughout the whole storyline, particularly at certain decision making moment, but you can’t really deny that one have never been in his shoes before, especially not after your twenties I presumed.

Don’t get me wrong, I love Duncan, I love the love between him and Jimmy. And, I love Jimmy too. Maybe is the love between two of them were so naïve and pure, that actually stop me to think of what kind of thing that I actually wanted all this while. There were no doubt in guessing their own sexuality or any kind of those 90’s kind of gay-coming-out kind of plot, but more towards on how they treasure each and other existence. As simple as that. After all, this story is mainly about how these youngsters, more than two third of the characters are only seventeen years old, against those unfairness and how crucial that could be when you stand up for your own right, be a part of the mass, be a part of the energy and belief and the little faith that you have that you will never want anything to put it off. The second character I love the most in this novel denoted to Virgil, an old folk that who was so wise and experience. He had made a short speech in between the book, stated

“… And I can honestly say that all of it – all of it - seems to have led me to where we are, here and now. I’m not saying we’re going to change everything. Heck, I don’t even know if we’re going to change anything. But there are moments - either in your own life or the life of the world around – when an even looks you right in the eye and says: this is important. What are you going to do?” and our answer – right here, right now- is that we are going to take a stand... Good doesn’t triumph because anybody tells it to. It triumphs when we push it and carry it and shout it and embrace it until it triumphs. That’s what we’re doing here. That’s why we’re going.”

I get goose-bumps after I completed the speech Virgil delivered. That is simple yet thrilling. I love the fact the author put into different stories of different characters and making every of them stand a little. There were quite a number of motivated speeches throughout the whole plot, especially the gay Jewish president, Abraham Steinz.

Well, however, there were things that I do not really adore in this book. I would rate this book as 4 out of 5. I love the simplicity of the overall storyline in the book. But thing got a little bit too simple on the protest, on the people getting involved, and everything seems a little bit too surreal. I do wish a little bit more excitement could happen. Of course not into those commercialized or cheesy way, but slightly more intense plot could definitely add some weight to the whole story. Well, of course I do not know what else or what more the author could add, or maybe this is what they author wanted the readers to received, that things shouldn’t get into too dirty and confusing when you have faith, love and trusts?

And I think I could represent most of the minority community in Malaysia to speak this out loud that, we adore the freedom of United States owning. However, we could easily tell that by breathing through the air of freedom, there is a smell of sacrifices. I think we, Malaysians, were lack of the guts in doing the right thing that we have always believed in. But now, I do have faith and started to believe in ourselves. We are ready. We are wide aware.